Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship

It is essential to find the balance between privacy and secrecy in a romantic relationship. You may end up in trouble if you do not set the boundaries or clarify the difference early on.

In this blog, we will talk about how these two factors impact a relationship. We will also suggest a few ways you can secure your relationship.

Difference Between Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship

Knowing the difference between the two will help you make better decisions. It is important to realize the massive difference and maintain a balance to navigate the upcoming challenges in a relationship.

Private Zone in a Relationship

Privacy is a basic right that both partners should have in a healthy relationship. One has the right to maintain some boundaries, personal life, and individuality. 

Privacy could refer to activities,  thoughts, or even conversations you deem personal. You understand that these things may not be related to your romantic relationship. 

A few examples to help understand privacy would be chatting with a friend of the opposite gender or sharing a text. You would not intentionally keep it from your partner and may feel it’s a normal thing in day-to-day life. 

It is normal to feel such a thing does not need mention or any particular disclosure. The problem surfaces when your partner does not feel the same way. Your partner may have different perceptions or expectations and may not like a particular action.

To better understand by imagining yourself in the same position. While you may feel it’s not a big deal, your partner may feel you chose not to inform them. It might further stem betrayal, mistrust, or even abandonment.

You have to put yourself in your partner’s shoes to find the gravity of the issue and help understand their feelings. Remember inviting problems where your partner feels you are not honest enough is the starting point of a future cyclone. The partners who are unable to trust their better half tend to get more cautious and keep an eye on other’s actions. They are only looking for an instance where you do it again, and things escalate.

However, there are all types of people, and a private person may not give it too much importance. But you have to be careful and thoughtful of how your partner feels. 

Initiating a private conversation you had and not disclosing it might become intentionally keeping things from your partner.

If you happen to go to that stage, you will lead a relationship that has resentment, insecurity, and lack of communication.

Secrecy in a Relationship

While privacy is a human right, going towards secrecy is not acceptable in any relationship. Being secret about your whereabouts or intentions is altogether a different game. 

You may do it due to the fear of consequences or the reaction, but it still comes under the realm of secrecy. It is different from privacy where you do not withhold any information intentionally. Secrecy has the potential to turn the tables and invite mistrust and deceit in a relationship. 

Once your partner finds out that you have been keeping things from them, it will have a devastating effect on your equation. Irrespective of how loving a relationship you have shared till now, secrecy can cause irreparable damage.

Even if you are doing it due to fear of judgment, it does not justify the deed. You will have to come up with an agreement with your partner and end up keeping secrets. Having a secretive relationship is in no way going to grant happiness to anyone in the long run.

Ways to Tackle the Situation

You have to be smart and understand the implications of being secretive in the relationship. There are some ground rules you should be aware of to avoid complications in the journey.

Boundaries – Setting boundaries is an important part of setting the tone in a relationship. You should be able to communicate with your partner to have a clear idea of expectations and personal space. 

A couple has to talk freely about what they mean by Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship to avoid future complications. You should be open to the idea that every person is unique and has a different mindset. It can only work when you discuss controversial issues and know what works for your relationship. 

If you strongly feel something may or has intruded on your personal space, you should be upfront about it. Be empathetic to your partner and try to understand their concerns while asking for space. Try to address their fears and concerns without being defensive. 

Having a safe space where you can go and discuss everything with your partner will help you lay the foundation of a strong relationship.

Build Trust – To ask for private time or space, you have to ensure that your partner trusts you. Being transparent is the only way a relationship can bloom. There is a difference between Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship and you should be aware of your own feelings. 

If you are doing something your partner won’t approve of and keeping it private, you are committing a mistake. You cannot name it privacy, and the one who does it already knows about it. 

Remember, secrets have done no good to anyone, and the sooner you realize, the better it is. It is crucial to be honest with your partner and share your innermost feelings to help them trust you.

You should keep in mind that what you deem private should not hurt your partner in any way. Also, you do not keep any secrets from your partner to avoid any consequences. 

Reach a middle ground so there is a clear boundary between Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship. Only then can a relationship survive and strengthen over time. 

Bottom Line

Secrecy and Privacy in a Relationship can often have unclear demarcation and may cause trouble in a relationship. It is crucial to differentiate between the two and be clear about what comes under personal space. 

Give ample thought to your belief system and mind when a deed becomes a secret you wish to keep from your partner. 

Having secrets in a relationship is inviting mistrust and creating barriers. Focus on the well-being of your relationship to keep it healthy and flourishing. Remember setting boundaries, open communication, and honesty are vital parts of maintaining a happier relationship.